Fear

Fears.. do you have any?

G took me to see "The odd life of Timothy Green".  It has adoption weaved into it and I just knew I needed to see it :). 
The scene that just ripped my heart...
(the docs told them that they had tried "everything" and there was nothing more that they could do to try to have a child.  They went home, knowing all hope crushed.  But they just couldn't get up their dreams yet that night.  After writing down all the characteristics they hoped their child would have on little pieces of paper (like funny, never give up, musical, would score one winning goal),

they put them all in a box and buried them.
In the dirt.  In the garden.

My tears wouldn't stop..my heart ached.

This is my fear.. that my long long dream of adopting my china girl would be crushed.  What if? What if it never happens? What if God never picks us?  What if God thinks we won't be good enough parents?

NO, LORD! Please no! Don't make me bury my dreams!

But G's little words whisper in my ears, that even through pain and unplanned plans, that yes, God can bring good, possibly better plans.

Give it up, P.. God is whispering, "For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. 

So let the waters rise if You want them to, I will follow You