straighten the little life of me

ah, and the world is right.. when "Club Awesome" is on

ah.....

I wonder is my brain is dead.  I have nothing to share. on here. or fb.  blah, I say.  Is this normal?  Do other people deal with this? 

But then tonight at church a young girl told me when she overheard me talking about adoption.. she said, "oh, yeah, then you can be the family that nobody wanted."  ah, WHAT?!  wow, ok, so she is just a kid, but her mom just laughed.  In prayer the ladies were mentioning all the pg ladies or ladies that just popped and how waiting is soooo tough.  ok, so all suddenly my dead brain is angry.  yes, I know.  I need love.  It's just soo annoying...so let me say this... This family is NOT a unwanted family.  It has been dreamed of, prayed for, cried over, lost sleep over, feel like my heart being crushed often.  for years!  and if you think waiting for 10 months for a child is hard.. give me a break. 

Keep dreaming

Sometimes the dream of adoption is overwhelming.  Will God ever bring me our child?  as I page through lists of children that dream of having someone to love them, my heart is so heavy.  Sometimes it feels like that I'm doing heavy weight lifting and my spotter left me and all the weigh has crushed against my heart.  And no one has noticed. As I struggle to breathe.

Some dreams stay with you forever drag you round but bring you back to where you were. Some dreams keep on getting better but you gotta keep believing if you wanna know for sure.

I chose to.....
                              keep on dreaming even if it breaks my heart